How come I can’t meet women that want to date and have a …
How come I can’t meet women that want to date and have a …
All the women I talk to just want sex from me. I’m 29 years old good looking and successful. I’m a player. I usually have 5 girls I see and talk to at a time. I.
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How come I can’t meet women that want to date and have a …
I want to become an alpha male and need step by step instruktions!
Get more info at my site BeBig.co.cc
Alpha male according to wikipedia:
“The term “alpha male” is sometimes applied to human beings to refer to a man who is powerful or in a high social position, similar to hegemonic masculinity. It is also used to explain the conduct of several adolescents that compete openly to call more attention, often being hostile. Humans evolved to promote an alpha within the group that possesses characteristics cooperation over competition. The competitive characteristic evolved to maintain not disrupt social order.”
First I want to correct some misunderstandings about alpha males.
An alpha male do not need to treat others bad.
An alpha male do not need to be a “psyco”
An alpha male do not need to be evil.
If you want to become a alpha male, there is some things you need to take special attention to.
1. Always be polite
2. Always be well dressed
3. Always be clean
4. Always have a good haircut.
5. Always, walk, talk and act with dignity.
6. Always treat other people with respect.
7. Always show confidence!
1. Be polite!
A good alpha male is often a gentleman. If you want to rule as a alpha male, you got to think forward. If you want to rule, people got to like you. So, you got to be polite. If you are the polite guy on the block, Soon everybody will know and the girls will open their eyes.
2. Be well dressed!
With that I do not mean that you always should wear costumes or expensive brands. The only thing that you need to think of, is that the clothes need to be clean and tidy. Even the most simple and cheap clothes, can make you look “sharp” if they are clean and if you wear them right. Step two in this category is to match colors right, but there, common sence will dough
3. Be clean!
This step is maybe the esiest and do not need to be mensioned. It is always good to smell good and your clothes should be clean and whole.
4. Have a good haircut!
With that, I do not mean that you shold run to the barber shop every now and then, just keep it clean combed and maybe have a good scent.
5. DIGNITY!!!
This is the single most important thing you have to think of. Everything you do, have to be with dignity. It is close to #7 confidense. Straighten you back, always talk with a clear voise, and never show that you are unsecure.( like everyone feel somethimes )
6. Show respect!
Every human been is woth respect and if you want to rule, you got to show everybody some. Even the one that do not deserve respect, need it and in the longrun, you will benefit from it, even if it will hurt you at the moment.
7. Show confidense!
Very close to #5. Dignity. This two steps is the most importante. Straighten your back, up with your chin,back with your shoulders, do not forget to articulate and always talk with a clear confident voise. Practise this in front of your mirror, it is important to get this right.When you shake hand with someone, the shake have to be firm and always fresh.If you wear gloves, take them off. Look the person in front of you in the eyes and present your self with a clear voise. If someone gets wrong first impression, it is very hard to correct.
Then we have the thing about women!
If you follow this step you should get every women to love you. Even if you do not look so good, with this steps, you can not miss.
Practise this at home tonight, tomorrow night, you go out to the nearest pub and test it. When you hook up a girl, do not feel like you are fooling her, you are not fooling anyone, you are adult, and she is adult, so everything is ok.
Read this through several times and practicse your posture, learn how to articulate and don not forget the firm handshake. About the handshake, if you get this right, you start with a big PLUS!
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Does facial hair make you look like a alpha male?
Get more info at my site BeBig.co.cc
The other day I got a question from a friend of mine?
Does facial hair make you look like a alpha male?
My straight answer was, of course, a three day “stubb” makes you very attractive. But when I got home I started to think. What makes you attractive?
Maybe we should look at our history to get a good answer.
Many of the old Greek god’s weare facial hair.
In the year 0, the romans where slothing Europe.
Almost every “alpha male” from there where “beardy”.
Vikings from northern Europe Where beardy.
Warriors from old England Where beardy.
Warriors from old Asia where beardy.
Many captains on ships, -1900, where beardy.
A big beard says that you are dangerous.
In the early 1900th, you where considered as a alpha male if you had a small “stripp” on your upper lip. Hitler made that to stop. But, some kind of hair on your upper lip is still going strong.
Many of our “hot” actors of today weare some kind of facial hair.
So,,,, everything says that if you want to look like a alpha male,,,,, go facial hair.
It is not your looks that makes you a alpha male,,, it is the act. Everyone can make him look like a alpha male,,,, but,,,,,, he will become one when he act like one.
Today, I got a sign up on my Weblog, and he have a blog about hair and what you should do not to loose it. But,,,, how about Vin Diesel, He looks pretty “alpha” to me, he is big and bald.
Another question I got was:
What steps do you need to do to become alpha male?
That I will save for another day.
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How to Win Over Any Woman – The Essence of Alpha Attitude
Have you ever noticed how we love to rate things?
We just love to give something a grade or a rating.
Have you ever been to the web site where you get to rate people? They flash you a picture of either women or men, and you get to click what you think they are on a scale from 1 to 10. It’s actually addicting when you sit there for a while, because you start to get invested in the process of grading people based on their looks.
The shame of it is that there’s one important thing that’s left completely out of this process.There’s nothing to indicate if this person is even likable or not. What if she’s a bitch? What if she’s a selfish little me-monkey?
You can’t tell from the picture. (Well, most of the time.)
As a result, I won’t ever rate a woman as a “10.”
You can’t make that high a grade with me without having a good personality and character. Nobody gets a rating higher than 9 without having the complete package.
Now, I realize that I’m a little different. Most guys will easily give up the highest rating for a woman based on looks alone. In fact, they’ll even fall in lust over a woman and start selling their blood plasma based on her appearance.
In my book, that’s the worst kind of mistake to make.
Why? Because there’s no QUALIFICATION going on.
Remember that, because we’re going to come back to it again.
Back to the whole “rating people” thing.
They’ve done studies where they compared the features of men and women, and had people judge whether they were attractive or not, just like on that web site I was talking about. When men graded the women, they found a standard of what was considered “attractive.” They could even pinpoint it to a ratio of proportions on a woman’s face.
Distances were standard between the eyes, from the eyes to the mouth, from the eyes to the nose, etc.
What they found was that what guys found “hot” was actually pretty predictable.
When the women rated the men on their appearance, they found that they were more scattered. Women had different criteria. Some things were standard, sure. A strong jaw-line was important – for most. But really there wasn’t a lot that they agreed on. Tastes were all over the map. Some liked big noses, some liked small ears, some liked facial hair, some didn’t.
If you’ve ever been around women rating guys, they are just like this. Very few will agree on what they find “attractive.”
Why is this?
It’s because women know they need to know the guy before they can make that call. Women take time to decide whether or not they’re attracted to you because they know that your CONFIDENCE and ATTITUDE really stack the deck.
Now back to qualification…
You may have even heard of this term before.
What does it mean?
I came up with a simple definition that works: Qualification is when you decide to be CHOOSY.
Really that’s all there is to it.
It’s the attitude that says:
After a few hours in front of a computer screen rating women, you start to forget that they are not just pretty faces, but they have personalities.
And a lot of them have personalities that could make you potentially VERY miserable.
You’ve got to TALK to these women.
You’ve got to tolerate being around them for longer than a few hours at a time.
I once dated this Russian girl that was unbelievably hot. I’m talking 9+ on most guy’s scales. She was FINE.
I actually met her when I interviewed her for a position at an Investment Bank where I was working at the time.
She was also really cocky and sure of herself, and her attitude just rolled me over.
I couldn’t hire her for the job, but I called her and asked her out. We had a decent first date, with a little face-sucking at the Palace of Fine Arts here in San Francisco. (For those of you who have seen the movie “The Rock,” it’s the place where Sean Connery meets his daughter to talk to her.) Nice. Romantic.
The next time we went out, I had my goal in mind. But what I was beginning to realize was that I was dreading being around her.
She was constantly talking. Yap yap yap. ME this, and ME that.
“Look what I’ve done. I’m so proud of myself…“
It was starting to get sickening. But she was so HOT! AND so damn annoying…
I distinctly remember going back to her place on the third date and hanging out there while she read me a truckload of her bad poetry. I was all “That’s great!” and “How beautiful!“
What I forgot was that I should have had standards. I didn’t QUALIFY her.
And in the end, she ended up pushing me out the door and telling me that she wasn’t going to sleep with me, after making me tell her how much I thought of her and how great an a$$ she had. Talk about humiliating.
Ever since that experience, I remembered my lesson, and I kept it on the front of my mind so that I learned from it. (You might notice that I have no problem telling you about my mistakes because I want you to realize that I’ve made a lot of the same ones you have.)
The “Big Lesson” was this: I got her interested in me and demonstrated my Alpha Power when I had first INTERVIEWED her.
THAT was what got her interest spiked! I was Qualifying her that whole time, demanding that she tell ME why I should be interested in her.
If I’d just kept qualifying her a little more, called her on her self-centered behavior, told her that her poetry needed a few less five-syllable words … and basically kept qualifying her the way I had been from when I was interviewing her, I would have been able to either satisfy my “carnal curiosity” … or dumped HER instead before she drove me nuts.
And since my “Big Lesson”, I’ve done just that. I reject women all the time when I sense that they’re going to be pills to deal with.
Let me tell you, it feels GREAT! And my posture of qualification drives them crazy with desire.
Now YOU need to be the one to decide whether a woman is worth your time and energy.
Don’t give up the reigns of control so quickly just because she’s got a pretty face.
Or pretty anything else…
Repeat after me: “Beauty isn’t enough!“
Until you have a chance to learn more about her, you can only say TSTR! “TOO SOON TO RATE!“
I don’t give up a 10 for ANY woman until I’ve gotten to know her, and find out if she’s a QUALITY woman.
Now, for you to get to the point where you feel you can turn down women takes a little work. I think I have something that will make it much easier for you to build this Alpha Attitude.
Carlos Xuma is a well-known expert in the dating-seduction related field and an author of bestselling titles such as “Secrets of the Alpha Male“, “Approach Women – NOW!“, “Alpha Immersion” and “Alpha Man Communication & Persuasion“.
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What to Talk About on a Date
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What to Talk About on a Date
Body language always speaks first in any Your verbal dating conversation skills Your dating conversation will be made up Questions are powerful. Funny thing is “What do you love to do in your spare By asking these questions you will cause
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How to use Facebook to meet Women in 4 Easy steps
How to Use Facebook to Meet Women in 4 Easy Steps…
I’ve had quite a few guys ask me about using the latest in social networking to get hooked up meeting women.
Well, it’s actually not that hard, but you have to do it with some understanding of how to play the game. Because there are many ways to do it wrong, and only a few to do it right…
QUESTION ABOUT FACEBOOK:
Carlos, hey man, thanks for all your great advice…
I wanted to ask you about something – how can I use Facebook to meet women online?
I’ve heard that it can be done, but I can’t help thinking it would be weird and creepy to approach some of my friends’ friends like this and ask for a date.
But it seems like a MEGA opportunity to meet women.
How can I work this?
- Allen L., Houston
CARLOS XUMA ANSWERS:
I’ve been eyeing this method to meeting women for some time, and I agree completely. It IS a mega-mega opportunity to meet women…
…if it’s handled right.
First of all, let’s remember the catastrophe that is “Myspace.” (May it rest in peace.) That social network has been so polluted and abused that it’s really not useful anymore. I know I don’t take it seriously.
What happened there?
Well, first of all, everyone got slammed with spam. A few clever programmers and bulk friend programs, and suddenly you had Myspace pages that looked like web sites from the year 1998.
Cheap backgrounds, silly wallpaper, and everybody’s page looked like a 14-year-old girl’s bedroom, complete with Britney Spears posters.
Enter Facebook.
A whole lot classier than its trailer-park cousin, Facebook has maintained a better image. But with a bunch of cool toys and add-ons that made it interesting and more fun.
So how can you work this great social networking tool to help you with your dating life – while not looking like some pervert who got kicked out of the alleys of Myspace?
I’ll give you a very simple 4-step model to use. This is the one that my friends and I have used consistently to get results online.
STEP 1: Connect with the guys – and other women – who have a lot of cute girl friends.
In other words, connect with people that YOU are not interested in dating who have big networks.
You must be very indirect at first using Facebook.
Remember the lesson from Myspace – Don’t be a spammer!
This is not “match.com” or an online dating site, so don’t just start sending out invites and emails hoping to score based on numbers. We’ve come to hate the abusers, and you’ll just get your sorry ass kicked right off.
Start out with light connections. Think “friends first.”
Don’t make your Facebook profile look like you’re trying to meet women. Be subtle.
What you’re trying to do is multiply your results and increase your connection potential by meeting more people who know more people.
If you just start trying to hit on the women you’re interested in right off the bat, you’ll be limiting your results with shortsighted thinking.
Think out to the LONG term. The more cool people you connect with and forge relationships with, the more likely you are to connect with a woman naturally.
STEP 2: Connect with women you are interested in VERY indirectly.
What you have to do is send a simple friend request – and make sure you include a message with it!
You just say something like, “Hey, I saw we’re both friends with Greg… Then I noticed you’re a snowboarder, too… Ever go to Tahoe?”
You see what I did there? I left a question INSIDE my friend request. For her to answer it, she’s going to feel compelled to add me.
It’s also just something people are looking to do. Let’s face it, we all measure our social success by how many people we’ve got as friends on Facebook. We all want a HUGE network, so women will WANT to add you – if only to increase their friend count.
STEP 3: Start leveraging the tools.
Facebook has a huge amount of potential for the guy who wants to take advantage of them. You can add all kinds of cute little applications to send virtual drinks to friends, send goofy gifts, or even start your own polls and surveys.
But one of the best tools you need to be using is the GROUP function on Facebook.
In fact, in preparing for this article, I created the group “Carlos Xuma’s Alpha Lifestyle” to start connecting you guys together and enabling men to share information.
You can do this, too. Just create a group based on your passion and your local area.
I’m going to advise you to avoid starting a group based on “Warcraft” or on the latest hot actress.
Make your group something a woman can relate to and might be interested in. Maybe it’s the television show “Lost…” or maybe it’s about all things Italian.
Ba-da-bing! Now you’ve got a hook to use to invite her into your group.
STEP 4: Start escalating and creating more opportunities.
Remember, this is a VIRTUAL tool. It’s online.
In other words, your connections don’t REALLY exist anywhere except on some server in an air-conditioned room in a data center somewhere.
It’s up to YOU to bring these connections to life with events that you can invite people to.
Most people will stroll around this virtual network, but then never take it into the REAL world. That’s where YOU come in.
Maybe once a month you should organize a happy hour at your local favorite bar. Or maybe you make a Facebook group for wine tasters, and then every other Friday you meet up and go tasting the latest Pinot Noirs.
THAT is your opportunity to start looking for romantic potential in the groups. You have to remember that you can’t be a Facebook “pickup artist” and try to attract women online.
You have to build a network, forge some connections, and meet women in person to start creating the attraction.
That being said, you can also send out some playful introductions to women you don’t know and see if they bite. (Just make sure your profile has enough interesting bait for them to nibble at…)
- Write on people’s walls…
- Send a few virtual drinks…
- Send some good karma…
- Use the “Flirtable” app…
For the man with initiative, the Facebook world is yours.
So step up and start creating the social network, then start meeting the women in it.
By the way, if you’d like to add me as a friend, go look me up. Carlos Xuma on Facebook.com… Get Social!
Carlos Xuma is a well-known expert in the dating-seduction related field and an author of bestselling titles such as “Secrets of the Alpha Male“, “Approach Women – NOW!“, “Alpha Immersion” and “Alpha Man Communication & Persuasion“.
How to Meet Women With No Rejection
How to Meet Women With No Rejection
Prejudice. What do you think of when you hear this word? For a lot of people it stirs up some anger and bad feelings. It used to do the same for me, too…
Before I give up one of my secrets, I want to talk about a dirty word with you.
Well, it’s not a cuss word, but it’s dirty because no one wants to talk about it.
That word is: Prejudice.
What do you think of when you hear this word? For a lot of people it stirs up some anger and bad feelings. It used to do the same for me, too.
I grew up Italian and poor in a city in Upstate New York, near Buffalo. I used to catch a lot of grief for my nationality, but also because we had no money.
I remember distinctly one summer when I was working for the town. I had a few weeks left in the program to earn some money, and I was a po’ little 15 year old kid. I just needed a few bucks to buy some stuff I needed for the school year.
I remember sitting in the office of the town recreation board supervisor. A big fat guy named Ron, if my memory serves. I sat there in his front lobby for a while to wait and see if I would get the job for a little longer that year.
Before my turn came to talk to Ron to find out, in walks big Vinny. No, that’s no dumb mafia joke. Vinny was the son of a local business owner who had some clout in the area. Well, big Vinny and Big Daddy go into Ron’s office, while I watch Ron slap Vinny’s dad on the back like they were long-lost brothers. The door closes behind them and their laughter.
My heart sank.
Right then, I knew I didn’t get the job. Vinny was all set, and Carlos was out in the cold.
I remember sitting there with that disappointed feeling in my gut, knowing that this little rich kid was going to screw me out of my few extra dollars for the summer. Money that daddy could have given him in a minute, but would take me a month to earn.
And now I wouldn’t get it, and there wasn’t a thing I could do about it. It was the good ol’ boy’s club, and I didn’t meet their membership requirements.
Now, I could have gotten all mad about it, stomped my feet about it not being “fair,” and all. It really wasn’t even Vinnie’s fault. He couldn’t know.
But I remember having another realization. I thought that if Ron was stupid enough to hire a lazy dweeb like Vinny, then they can keep their lousy job.
Of course, that wasn’t much consolation. Until I came up with another realization: I would WIN.
No matter how much the odds were stacked against me in life, I would prevail. I could have my dick kicked in the dirt, and I would get back up again.
So why am I telling you this? Yet another of Carlos’ childhood stories… Well, it’s because the unfair situation that I found myself in doesn’t have to happen to you. Even if it comes up in another way.
You’re a victim of women’s prejudice, and you might not be aware of it. Just the same way I was as a kid, you are now. And it has nothing to do with your appearance or color of skin or even your income.
Let’s break down the word a bit.
Pre-jud-ice.
Pre-judge.
To judge too soon.
Get this: It’s been shown in some recent studies that we make snap decisions about people based on facial expressions and body language that takes place in less than the BLINK OF AN EYE. Literally.
I just finished this great book, “Blink” by Malcolm Gladwell. It’s a study of how the human brain makes all these complicated decisions without us even knowing about it.
In his book, he talks about these indicators and signals that we don’t know we’re seeing, but we’re making judgments about other people based upon them.
Now something I want to add to this is that women are making them about YOU without you knowing about it.
Some of them will change if you take control of them, but a lot of them are tied DIRECTLY to your sense of self-esteem. You’ll show them because they’re impossible to control entirely.
Whoah. Think about that for a second. There are a bunch of things you can control about your appearance and so forth, but a lot of these behaviors are OUTSIDE your control. (Well, not completely, as I’ll explain.)
I think this means that a lot of guys out there are treating the symptoms rather than the disease.
And that’s exactly what you’re doing if you are trying to learn a ton of new “tricks” and seduction/hypnosis tools without training yourself and working on your INNER game first. All those cool hypnotic words and “negging” techniques don’t work right if you don’t know how to properly communicate your Alpha value to a woman.
Sure, you can “peacock,” but you have to have the right belief system to back it up or you’ll come across as a dweeb in a top hat and eye-liner.
There’s some good news here, though. You can learn how to override a woman’s “Blink” response to you by bypassing it entirely.
That’s right. When you demonstrate Alpha Male confidence, you are creating the persona (a REAL persona, not a fake) that will shut down or short circuit her subconscious attempts to shut you out of her life.
After all, on one hand, a woman wants love and affection and all that comes with it …
… but on the other hand she also wants a trouble-free life. She has enough drama already, and she wants to avoid any possible heartache. So she creates a lot of fancy protection mechanisms to keep you from getting by without impressing her in the right way.
Just like a rock concert where you can’t get past the big dudes guarding the band from groupies.
All you need is a backstage pass. That backstage pass is a concise method to approach women in any situation. To show, through your verbal power, that you are -
For a long time, I had a problem talking with women. They just seemed like an alien life form to me. They liked makeup and sleepovers and pop songs about “girl power.”
I felt like I had nothing in common with them.
But I finally figured out the amazing core elements of good conversation, and they work like a charm on just about everyone you’ll meet. These elements can be learned and practiced with just about anyone, anywhere.
Here’s one of them: Start with a contextual “opener.”
What is a contextual opener? Well, it’s one that obeys the rule of “Where the hell are you?“
In other words, if you want to walk up to that girl at the grocery store and say hello, don’t ask her if she saw the fight out front. Don’t tell her you want to read her palm. Those are club openers that would sound stupid in the Safeway meat section.
Instead, make sure the opener fits the situation. Not only will it work better, but you’ll be much more believable with the words. It’s a lot easier to talk about the real world around you than try to make up something dumb.
“Hey, have you tried that new high-quality roast beef they sell here? I’m planning a party and I want to know if it would be good to put on the platter.“
There you go.
Does it make her toes tingle and her ni pples pop out? No. But it makes SENSE for where you ARE. And she’ll be much more likely to respond.
Now, after she responds, chances are that she’ll be a little overwhelmed by this unexpected interest and may be a bit bashful. (Guys often misinterpret a woman’s shyness as disinterest.) This is where you have to reassure her and carry the conversation forward.
“Now if I’d known you weren’t an expert on deli meats I would have asked someone else. But hey, you looked friendly.” Shrug and say this with a slight smile. “Are you here doing some shopping after work?“
And just gently carry it forward…
Carlos Xuma is a well-known expert in the dating-seduction related field and an author of bestselling titles such as “Secrets of the Alpha Male“, “Approach Women – NOW!“, “Alpha Immersion” and “Alpha Man Communication & Persuasion“.
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